Excerpt from work in progress.

First off, Merry Christmas to all! I wanted to share an excerpt from what is meant to be chapter one of a book that I want to write. As far as I can recall, only one other person has read this. I’d love to get some honest feedback. Want to know if you all think I should keep going.

The protagonist’s name is Dana Scanfir. Neat last name, huh? Anyhow, she leaves her hometown to pursue some career related to the music industry. She’s not sure what, she just knows that it’s got to be music. Let’s just say she gets caught up…


“Freakin’ key hole. Why do they make these things so damned small?” I stumble in and make it into the room. Stumble. I seem to be an expert at stumbling. Jesus, am I even home? Pull off all my clothes and drop them to the floor and fall into the bed. I’m on my side and try to catch my breath. I open my eyes and struggle to focus on anything, then it’s Poe all over again. My heart’s beating like mad – as if to say, “Figure it the hell out, kid. You can’t possibly have done it again.” If I close my eyes, I’ll fall asleep like always. I’ll wake up and everything will be fine. Damn it. Did I set my alarm?

9:47. Shit. I can get ready in ten minutes. I’ve done it before. Brush my teeth, take the fastest shower ever, change. Yeah. Ten minutes. Is it bad that this toothpaste tastes good? Yum. As the water hits my body, I realize that this is going to be the only me time I will have for the rest of the day. “You’re under a waterfall, Dana, and it feels so good.” I’m oddly alert now. After I turn off the water, I stand still and can feel each drop of water fall off of me. I shake my head like my dog, Hana. Man, I miss her. 9:58. I am fucking amazing.


~ by Francis Orante on December 24, 2007.

One Response to “Excerpt from work in progress.”

  1. It is as though I have read this once before. Oh that’s right. Portland, Oregon!

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